The Path of Least Resistance: Sexy Submission and the Zen of Flexibility

Someone once said that I take the path of least resistance. They didn’t say it to me of course. Probably never thought it would get back to me. It was intended as an insult. Lacey takes the easy way out. I see their point. But I disagree with the intent. There are times when the path of least resistance is the right choice.

The Path of Least Resistance

The implication is that someone who takes the path of least resistance is passive. Maybe even lazy. I’m an American girl. Lived my whole life in red states. We’re salt of the earth people. We pull ourselves up by our bootstraps. We’re rugged individualists. There’s little patience for things like passivity and laziness.

Am I lazy? I mean, I do stuff. I don’t clean my house. I pay people to do that. If that makes me lazy, I guess I’m lazy. But here I am. I’m writing stuff. I’m taking pictures. I’m meeting people. Yesterday I was strenuously fucked. Trust me when I say energy was exerted. I don’t think that’s what this person meant when they accused me of taking the path of least resistance.

On Monday, I started writing a post for Bimbo Luxe about the difference between wants and needs. I wasn’t happy with it, so I set it aside. Yesterday, I came back to it to see if the post could be salvaged. I ran into the same problem. The topic was too cerebral. I have been dealing with some heady topics lately. It was wearing me out.

And that’s when it occurred to me. “I don’t want to think today.” The words felt right. Everything flowed from there. It was the path of least resistance. There was no struggle. No need to furrow my brow. I was my own true self. I’m not dumb. But sometimes, it feels good to just turn my brain off. Acceptance. Yeah, it felt really good.

I could have knocked my head against a wall until I had written an article about wants and needs. I may eventually write that post. If I had forced myself to write it when I wasn’t feeling it, it wouldn’t have been very good. I took the path of least resistance and I like the end result. I think it was somewhat poetic.

A Path to Pleasure

I received some interesting feedback on yesterday’s post. Hypno Daddy said it was a good conversational induction. Let me translate for the non-hypno people. Induction is a way to lull someone into trance. The structure was informal. Conversational. Sometimes inductions are very structured. With something like this, I could lull someone into trance without their awareness.

Does that sound passive? *giggles*

A reader on Primfeed shared my post there. He made the connection that being blank is a key component in dominance and submission. The submissive gives up control to a trusted dominant. This is not an act of weakness. It takes strength to submit. Courage to give up control. There’s pleasure in not having to make decisions for yourself.

I skimmed over some of the other content on his feed. There was a picture of a man submitting to a dominant woman. In the comments, there was a conversation in which it was made clear that this man wasn’t typically submissive. He said he had the strength to submit without questioning his masculinity. Dominance and submission isn’t about traditional gender roles. I got damp reading his remarks.

We are not simple beings. We contain multitudes. It is very easy for me to be submissive. It is by no means the path of least resistance. I can also be dominant. It doesn’t feel as natural at first. But I step into the role and I feel powerful. When I am with a slave, I take my responsibility to them seriously. They rely on me for all their needs. Contrary to what popular misunderstanding, being dominant is an unselfish act.

Zen of Flexibility

Resistance is over-rated. It is by nature inflexible. There are times when that is appropriate. If you come in here with hate, I’m going to resist the fuck out of you. I will stand up for what I believe in. But sometimes, it’s better to bend with the wind. The path of least resistance requires flexibility. And flexibility is another kind of strength.

I sometimes say that I always get what I want. That’s true from a certain perspective. I don’t hit a bullseye every time. It takes multiple attempts. And sometimes, I have to compromise. As a fashion blogger, I get rejections all the time. If I want to join a specific team, I may not get that. But if I’m flexible, I get what I want every time.

That means defining my goals more broadly. I may want to blog for a specific store. But if they turn me down, I can be flexible. I’ll find another store that satisfies than desire. Is that the path of least resistance? Maybe. But it sure is more fulfilling than stubbornly trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

Conversely, part of the reason I got fired from X-Sisters is that I was inflexible. At the time, I thought I was making a really important and principled stand. And I still believe I was right about a number of things. Had I followed the path of least resistance, I’d probably still be working there. I lot of the changes I pushed for ended up being implemented anyway. Turns out, I was being stubborn.

The path of least resistance isn’t always about taking the easy way out. Sometimes, it takes strength and wisdom to get out of your own way and go with the flow. To stop overthinking. Imposing your will on a world that is bigger than you. Accepting a truth that doesn’t fit your narrative. Hearing a collar lock into place with a satisfying click. And knowing that you have the strength to follow that path.